Lonely People (Quite the Rant)

Why is it that, in a world absolutely covered from stem to stern with people that modern humanity's greatest plight is no longer survival, butloneliness ? TV shows are about it, songs lament it, Jr. Highs reek of it; it is something that every person identifies with, which, if you think about it should be absurd. With so many people out there we should all just be longing for a littleloneliness . But yet we are all terrified of never "finding someone," of "dying alone." Even when we have oodles of friends and loved-ones we still are plagued by it. Why is that?

Try bringing a very cute baby to a store, let's say the grocery store, in the middle of the day. One is absolutely bombarded by lonely people just longing to talk to you, see your baby, hold your baby. And I'm not saying that everyone who wants to talk to my kid and shake her hand or foot is lonely. You can tell the difference between the baby-lovers and the people whose kids are too busy for them and whose grandkids live across the country. You can tell who is lonely, the people who go to the mall several times a week for some human contact; buy things only to return them so that they have an excuse to talk to the clerks at the store. The socially-awkward guy who goes to the salon every three or four weeks just to have human touch. Ask a hairdresser. They can tell the difference between a guy coming in for a haircut and a guy coming in because he hasn't had human contact in a very long time. Or a massagetherapist. I'm sure they have stories.

I've been to the bottom of it. I have old notebooks brimming with poetry dedicated to trying to figure out the emotions it dredges up. I have a wonderful husband whotruly loves me and stops at nothing to take care of me and our daughter and make us happy. I have a gorgeous, fun, happy baby with me every minute of the day. I've got several high-quality, thoughtful, fun friends, and tons more quasi-friends andacquaintances. I have a great family, and to top it off, I'm on more than speaking terms with the creator of the universe. And yet I am lonely nearly every day. Why? I'm not even an invalid or a shut-in. Good gracious, I can't evenimagine what that must feel like, how the loneliness must eat away at everything that makes a person human.

If only all the moms in a city could find each other. If only all the gawky pre dorks and come together. If only all the -teens could realize that they are all, in fact, big self-conscious [Oh, man, a big part got deleted here and I don't have the time right now to rewrite. sorry.] elderly people at the grocery store at three in the afternoon could start a bridge club or something. But we all sit in our houses alone and watch Oprah or what-have-you, hoping to "stay in touch" with the world that is passing us by. Life slips by quickly, and death knocks suddenly. Now I am depressing myself. And all I want to do is watch another episode of The O.C. because it is easier to be entertained than thinking, easier than feeling, easier than waiting, and easier than taking the time out of my own 'busy' life to care for all the other lonely people around me.